Longing for Answers

I’d be lying to you if I said I had it all together right now. I think most of us can relate in wanting answers to when this pandemic thing will finally come to an end. Some might be wondering what to do with their career or businesses. And some of us even wonder how the heck we will find a spouse behind our mask! 😉

This past week was probably a rollercoaster of emotions for me. While I love my career as a barber and enjoy the freedom of making my own schedule, I admit I must have held back a few tears every time a client would ask how my week was going.

After reopening my shop, things were never really the same, but this week I really felt the drastic drop of clientele. Fear creeped in and I started to feel frustrated, and any comment on this pandemic or the presidential election annoyed me. I simply didn’t want to hear it anymore. I wanted these conversations to disappear for good; I even prayed and asked God why He hasn’t yet brought a God-fearing husband into my life, as if this would solve the answers to my problems, but I was simply being honest with God in my frustration.

I was feeling defeated, lonely, and a bit hopeless. I even wonder why on earth does God think I’m strong enough to run a business during these times and especially as a single woman.

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But you know what? God already knows how I’m feeling, and He knows the answers to my deepest longings.

My friend, God knows exactly where you are and what you’re feeling as well. He knows you can’t live this life on your own and this is exactly why we’re in this place. To remind us all that life cannot be lived on our own, but by the power of the Holy Spirit given to us through the blood of Jesus Christ whom guides and provides for us throughout our lives.

God never promised us a perfect life nor a happy one. Joy is a choice regardless of our circumstances.

Either we choose to be defeated, or we choose to pick up our cross and walk each day at a time holding on to His promises and our faith in Him.

God delights in us seeking Him. He wants us to ask Him to meet us right where we are, and He longs for us to draw near to him and ask Him for help. It doesn’t matter how far away from Him we’ve gone; all He wants is to receive us with open arms as we run back to Him or to even look to Him for the very first time if we never have.

This season of unanswered questions is a season of recognizing the only truth that still remains.

Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise Him again- my Savior and my God!

~Psalm 42:5-6

The longing heart is, to some degree, a disappointed heart. It’s one thing to long for God, and another to live in discouragement about His seeming absence. Longing can be filled with hope or with doubt, and far too often we settle for low expectations. We may not even know why, but we just assume the worst. We let our past disappointments dictate out future in some sense.

God gives us the ability to choose our own posture, we aren’t victims of our moods; we’re their masters.

Today, we can make the conscious decisions to believe, trust, hope, expect God’s goodness, and reject doubt and overcome fears. We don’t have to live in discouragement. We can take our eyes off of our circumstances and fix them on God’s track record of being faithful throughout our lives. Sooner or later, He fulfills hope and He will satisfy our longing hearts and our needs.

Trust God, and Do Good 🙂