Perfectly Imperfect

As I continue to study God’s word and experience a journey with a fiancé in this perfectly imperfect world, I continue to notice how broken I am inside and how many things of my past still consume me. I observe the world and how society continues to play a huge role in the new view of feminism. I had NO IDEA how “feminist”  I had become in some ways because of a past divorce, stories I’ve heard of unfaithfulness, and my want of feeling more powerful then men because of all of it.

But how did wanting “equal rights” become way more then what it was supposed to be? It was as if all of a sudden women began to want more power overall in every area of their lives! Thats not what God wants for and from us. Although, I do agree with some of the arguments and love to see women succeed, I strongly believe that God comes before us in everything that we do…

But what does that even mean or, how does that look like?

What it doesn’t look like; women who dress in provocative ways to seek wrong attention, women who step all over husbands to get their way, women who bow down to their boss for a paycheck yet go home to a husband who has no say in the house hold, and women who believe that it’s okay to have sex with anyone and anywhere whenever they want, just to name a few…

Feminists want equal rights, while God created us to be different for his divine purpose.

“so God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.” Genesis 1:27

  • Herts are broken
  • We’re in desperate need of repair
  • We are seeking comfort in wrong places
  • And, we’re forgetting who’s we are

In moments of desperation and feeling lack of physical pleasure, material possession, and the want to feel more significant brings us to the place of hopelessness. A place where we loose our focus on the one above and turn toward temptation as we focus on what we don’t have rather than on what God has given us. And don’t misunderstand me, these things aren’t bad, they only become dangerous until they become more important than the will of God for us. Don’t allow these things consume you!

Both Jesus and Eve were tempted in the same way. Even though Eve had the perfect relationship and the perfect surroundings, Eve focused on the one thing God told her not to have, and the serpent knew how to convince her to sin in ways that he knew she would fall (Genesis 3:1-5.)  Jesus was also tempted in the same way that she did, (on Matthew 4) but the difference with him was that Jesus quoted scripture to the enemy by saying “it is written,…” until the enemy went away. Jesus never took his focus off of the Lord, which is what we should do.

We too get tempted by the enemy and sadly sometimes without even realizing it. I tend to get frustrated at times just thinking about the things I still need to improve on in myself. Being in a second serious long term relationship has become a daily mirror to me where now as a Christian, I beat myself up for not changing my flaws quick enough for my own speed. Fear always get’s in the way! Will I ever trust again?!? I forget that God is in control and not me. I fall into a bad habit of wanting to “change” things on my own. Thoughts come into my mind that no man will ever respect me and by me being submissive will only enforce him to walk all over me. But how do you explain those thoughts and feeling to someone that has never walked in your shoes to experience that pain only so they can at least “understand” the way your mind works.

One thing I do know is that the Lord is at hand. I’m not the same person that I used to be, and God has made me the person who I’ve become. In his word, I find my strength, joy, and peace. I am perfectly imperfect by the one who created it all…

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your request be known to God. Ant the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” ~Philippians 4:6-7

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